I finally had a real sex dream...sort of.

I've had a handful of borderline "sex dreams" over the years. In the majority of them some kissing or touching occurs and then I either cannot recall any further or I wake up. The fact that some sexual act is going to occur is always implied and I'm generally a bit disappointed once conscious; kind of like waking up after a night of heavy drinking and realizing you probably had a really good time with the person beside you, but all the details are blurred or nonexistent. 

Well, over the past couple weeks or so I've had 2 substantial sex dreams. I'm curious to find out if there's no going back to my previous dream patterns, will they all be X-rated now? I hope so. While they were both rather strange, they were satisfyingly vivid and broke down some major barriers.

 In brief, the first involved my elementary school best friend (at her current age...). She and I were laying on her bed, just catching up, and then we began making out. She stood up, grinned and said "I have a confession". She proceeded to reveal a huge (obscenely, ridiculously huge) penis. I wasn't shocked or bothered by this in the slightest. We began having sex, although this would have been physically impossible in real life due to her comically large package, and the rest of the encounter I cannot recall. 

Although I have very little desire to sleep with women, let alone trannies* (or maybe, that would be preferable. It's difficult to say), I woke up very pleased. For the first time in an entire decade of borderline-intimate dreams, there was penetration. I feel much more normal now after being nailed by a childhood friend with an enormous appendage, vs never having a similar experience  in the dream world that I could recall. 

My second dream, which involved another huge step in the right direction, I will elaborate on later. It had all the necessary story components: setting, characters, a conflict, key events, a climax, and an ending. No fuzzy conclusion. Let's just say it came to a end.

*I was familiar with the expression "chicks with dicks" however, there are other options: sluts with nuts, dolls with balls, & dudes with boobs. Thanks wikipedia.

Also, I really want to see this...

Sunday

Today, instead of doing any substantial cleaning, I chose to take the majority of my food items, most of which were close to their expiration date, and go on a cooking frenzy. The result: Massaman curry, spicy slow-cooked chicken (that will be a great burrito-filler or omelet addition), pear, date, and raspberry compote, chai-infused rice pudding, and some flat bread that will be grilled in the very near future. I am most pleased with the rice pudding and the fact that the pudding and flat bread were the only items to require a recipe, both of which I tweaked a decent amount. I haven't spent much time preparing my meals over the past couple weeks and was experiencing serious withdrawal today.
Here's the recipe, provided by the great Alton Brown, with changes that I made. I'd say my version is less Indian, more Thai.

Indian Rice Pudding

Ingredients

• 1 cup cooked long grain or basmati rice (I used Jasmine)
• 1 cup whole milk
• 1/2 cup heavy cream
• 3/4 cup coconut milk
• 2 ounces sugar, approximately 1/4 cup
• 1/4 teaspoon ground cardamom ( I didn't have this, so I steeped 2 chai teabags in a little hot milk, and added approx 1/8 teaspoon of coriander for no good reason, and then 1 teaspoon of vanilla extract) 
• 1 1/2 ounces golden raisins, approximately 1/3 cup
• 1 1/2 ounces chopped unsalted pistachios, approximately 1/3 cup
• I omitted the raisins, because I didn't have any, and the pistachios because i didn't trust the texture...also I didn't have any.

Directions

In a large nonstick saute pan over medium heat, combine the cooked rice and milk. Heat until the mixture begins to boil. Decrease the heat to low and cook at a simmer until the mixture begins to thicken, stirring frequently, approximately 5 minutes.

Increase the heat to medium, add the heavy cream, coconut milk,sugar, and cardamom and continue to cook until the mixture just begins to thicken again, approximately 5 to 10 minutes. Use a whisk to help prevent the cardamom from clumping. Once the mixture just begins to thicken, remove from the heat and stir in the raisins and pistachios. Transfer the mixture to individual serving dishes or a glass bowl and place plastic wrap directly on the surface of the pudding. Serve chilled or at room temperature.